Mourning

(This was meant to be posted yesterday, however, my husband asked me to wait until today.)

For some people, each day is a struggle. Finding purpose and meaning in this life is that struggle. It can become overwhelming and seem impossible. God created each one of us with purpose. We are not here by chance or coincidence. This is realized by the fact that we ALL search for meaning and purpose. If we did not have a reason for being alive, then we wouldn’t even think to search for that meaning.

Some people have become so overwhelmed by the pursuit of purpose and meaning that they give up. Even Christians have given up. The trials that we face in this life become too unbearable. The disappointments and the many times we stumble in this walk with the Lord can cause some people to stop living all together. The enemy, as we all know, is an opportunist. He will prey on the weak in efforts to destroy them. The bigger problem is that, when the enemy effectively destroys one member of the body of Christ, it will most certainly be felt by many others. The enemy will also prey on the one person that will cause the most collateral damage.

This morning my husband got a call from our pastor. Our pastor met Malachi in our parking lot to inform him of some recent events. My husband walked back in the house a few moments later. The news he was to deliver to me was not happy news. A dear friend and brother in Christ took his life last night. There were no easy words my husband could have used to break this to me gently. Those of you who know my testimony, will know that this hit me pretty hard. All I could do was cry. I am confident that this person is with the Lord. However, the thoughts that ran through my mind were devastating to me. I know what it takes and where a person must be emotionally and mentally in order to make such a permanent decision. The loneliness and despair is almost unbearable for me to remember. My heart hurts for my friend. The place he must have been and the desperation and hopelessness he had to have felt deep within the pit of his being, is all too familiar to me. Even now, when I know the hope of Jesus Christ, I can still remember the emotional state I was in and how the enemy exploited my emotions.

It is this knowledge that I wish I didn’t have. I know all too well the place a person must be in this situation. It makes me angry that the enemy can lie to us in such a way to make us feel hopeless. This is why we all need to, as our pastor told my husband this morning, “Check our armor”! The enemy seeks to destroy us! This was made even clearer to us today.

Please be in prayer for this young man’s family as they mourn.

My testimony may help some of you to understand what a person must be feeling in order to commit suicide. For some though, I understand that you will never understand and that actually may be better.

Serving God and My Family,
Crystal <>< (SAHM)