2011 Reflections and Prayers for 2012

As the year of 2011 comes to an end, many people stop and take some time for deep reflection.  Some ponder the life events that occurred over the past 12 months, and try to find meaning or purpose in all of it.  Others move past the past and look on ahead to the future; making resolutions and plans for a prosperous and successful new year.  Then, there are those who do a little bit of both, reflect on the past 12 months while also planning for the next 12 months to come.  

When I reflect on the past 12 months so many thoughts come to mind, first being of my sweet Eleanor who was born on February 28^th in the safety and comfort of our home.  Her birthday is special in two very important ways:

• 1)      The Lord blessed us with a new daughter, Eleanor Michelle!  I experience two very painful miscarriages (for a total of 5 miscarriages) prior to becoming pregnant with her and I had prayed fervently that the Lord would bless my womb again – and He did!

• 2)      I experienced the wonderful blessing of a homebirth.  It is by far my most cherished accomplishment.  Having Eleanor at home permanently removed all fear of natural childbirth that had been plaguing me since I had my first child 5 years ago.  The Lord proved Himself merciful and gracious in that He gave me the strength and confidence to trust in His handy work in creating and designing my body to not only endure the pain of labor and childbirth but to fully enjoy and  revel in the miracle of life in the most precious way possible.  He secured for me a special bond with my sweet Eleanor that only furthers my deep appreciation for the miraculous life of all of my children. He used that one single experience to breed a confidence and passion for life, truth, and wellness that no one can steal from me!

Honesty is the next thing that comes to mind when I think about the past 12 months.  Sometime in the middle of the year I shared some of the struggles that my sweet Sofia had been having, and to my surprise I received an abundance of encouragement and love that far surpassed my expectations.  I also learned that I was not alone, and that other Christian families had struggled with the same thing, or were currently struggling.  The Lord brought people into my life that He used to help us help Sofia.  Over the past few months there have been great changes and all glory goes to the Lord!  Modifying her diet, incorporating a few new vitamins and supplements, not to mention all the time we spent praying for wisdom, has born more fruit than we ever imagined it would.  We got our daughter back!  She hasn’t had a meltdown in a couple of months and has just continued to blossom under the close and watchful care of parents who would go to the ends of the earth for her.

I’ve found that in the course of the past 12 months I’ve grown closer to my husband, and even more reliant on him.  I’ve learned some hard lessons on friendship and where my loyalty is to ultimately lie.  I’ve learned that relationships change, some for the better, and some for the worse and that is ok – life goes on.  I’ve learned that no matter what happens, I can depend on my husband for the loving compassion and encouragement that cannot be rendered from any other person.  Whether I have one friend, five friends, one hundred friends, or no friends; my heart is cherished by no one more than my husband.

Oh my darling children – the Lord has used the last year to renew my love for my children.  They are the Lord’s little gifts of joy all wrapped up in tender sweetness.  I have the great honor and pleasure of loving such precious daughters.  Sofia, Charlotte and Eleanor are my true delights; packages of loveliness.  I love being the mother of three little girls; each one with their unique personalities adds something distinctly different to our family.  I pray that the Lord gives me grace and wisdom when instructing them in the ways of the Lord, and discipling them for the work of biblical womanhood.  I have watched Sofia and Charlotte blossom into such tenderhearted little girls.  The Lord is showing Himself Sovereign in their lives as we witness Him cultivating their hearts for His use.  They love to learn about the Lord and each day the Lord blesses us when they share their hearts with us.  What an amazing honor to know that, at this moment we have our daughters’ hearts.  May we never take the awesome responsibility of shepherding their hearts for the glory of the Lord for granted.  We take the duty of guarding their hearts and minds so seriously for fear the Lord would smite us should we cause them to stumble.  They are so precious to us, how much more precious are they to Him, the One who made them?

Biblical womanhood and the journey of being the keeper of my home has been a quest from the moment I married my husband.  I’ve learned that when you are the mother of three little ones, the best place to spend the majority of my time is right at home with them.  There truly is no other place I’d rather be anyways.  My ministry is to my husband and children, and if I find myself being busy elsewhere, then I’ve effectively neglected my post, and things begin to fall apart.  My heart and affections need to be “plugged in” at home, throughout the course of my day and even throughout the night.  The Proverbs 31 woman never let her lamp burn out, and thus is the life of a mother with little ones – especially an exclusively breastfed little one.  

Helping and encouraging my husband is so important for the vitality of our marriage and family.  When scoffers try and attack his character or the genuineness of his personality then of course I am right there to defend him and to pray fervently against the attacks of the enemy.  I love my husband dearly, and am so very thankful the Lord allows me each day to be his helpmeet. 

Within this past year I have finished my Bachelor’s degree, which I had feared would never happen.  There were times that I simply wanted to give up, but I had much to prove to myself and to those who have labeled me a quitter all my life.  I remember as a teenager someone saying that I would never amount to anything; that I would always be a “screw-up”.  I am thankful that the Lord chose to show Himself merciful in my life because I would otherwise be something to be pitied.  All of my accomplishments are His, for I can do nothing good apart from Christ.  I’m thankful that He has given me a tenacity and a fierce desire for Truth, because if you saw the me that was before Christ, it sure was a pathetic sight to behold.  To God be the Glory!

The Lord showed my husband favor shortly after Eleanor was born and provided a wonderful job as a QA Manager/Analyst/Program Designer/IT Support/whatever the boss needs done!  He works for a Medical Software Development company and has learned more about the medical industry than he knew before.  He has earned a raise and is due for another review in a few months with another raise in store.  He enjoys his work, and one of the perks is that he can work from home if he has to; and has on several occasions worked late into the night or over the weekends.  He is currently creating custom graphics of the different parts of the eye (another hat he wears at work), and has enjoyed learning about that as well.  There are several people he works with who are of the same convictions as we are on mainstream medicine and health nutrition - including the owner, and this has given us great encouragement in the face of some who do not have the same convictions.  I've had the pleasure of watching my husband grow in a company that has given him job security and a place to hone his skills.  God is Good!

Not only do I have a crochet/sewing cottage business, I have recently became an Independent Distributor for Young Living Therapeutic Essential Oils.  I'm excited about this new business venture and joining Mrs. Stacy McDonald and many others in teaching others about the importance of health and wellness and how true Therapeutic essential oils can play a vital role in achieving optimum health.  I created my own website Southern Scentsabilities and am behind excited to share everything I've learned and am continuing to learn about caring for your families health through  the use of essential oils! 

 As this year comes to a close, and we all embark on the uncharted journey of a new year, I pray that the Lord would continue to remove those things from my heart and my life that seek to draw my affections away from Him and my family.  I pray that He would continue to guide me and teach me His ways.  I pray that He would strengthen my love and devotion for my husband and children, and cause me to find even more joy in being the keeper of my home.  I pray that as I continue to share my life through Serving God and Family that it would always point people to Christ.  I am who I am because the Lord has been merciful to me, and I pray that even when I write things that are controversial or against mainstream philosophies that I will remain consistent in a Biblical worldview, never faltering for fear of scrutiny or hateful criticism. 

I pray also that each one of my readers has a wonderful and blessed New Year, and that you will continue to seek the Lord in all things.  Love your husbands and children, and most of all, love the Lord with all of your heart! Soli Deo Gloria!

Serving God and My Family,

Crystal <><

The Lord God is Good!

Picture Credit

“For the Lord is good” Psalm 100:5

I have been reminded of God’s goodness, mercy and kindness over and over this past week. Malachi’s last day at GeoEngineers was this past Friday, and his entire office took us to lunch. They were all so very kind, and spoke so highly of my husband and how much they would miss him, and how upset they are about the lay off. I am always proud of my husband, but hearing other people speaking so highly of him, well, just made me prouder! The Lord has truly blessed us, even in Malachi being laid off.

I was anxious and worried for about a day, and then the Lord chastised me greatly yet encouraged me even more greatly. It seems every time I turn around Matthew chapter 6 pops up; in the new edition of the Homeschooling Today! Magazine, Ligonier Ministries Tabletalk magazine, this new book I have been reading by Dietrich Bonhoeffer “The Cost of Discipleship”. The reminder that God will provide for His children has given me great comfort and peace.

Malachi has been diligent about putting his resume in to every place he can think of. He has applied for about 25 different jobs, mostly D.O.D. (Department of Defense) jobs; although he did apply with two different companies in North Texas. We are willing to move anywhere at this point for Malachi to get a good job. We would prefer Texas because of the Homeschool laws; and my best friend lives there and I would LOVE to live close to her and her family. We also have other close friends that we love dearly who live in Texas, so it would give us an opportunity to be closer to them as well (win win for everyone).

My recovery from the miscarriage and the D&C was rough, but praise God for His unmerited grace towards me. My Hcg levels are FINALLY at zero; it only took about a month. My follow-up appointment with my OB went extremely well. I was more worried that he may not continue seeing me since we will have no insurance coverage after the 30^th; but he assured me that I will always be his patient and that we could pay $5 a month if need be. He did prescribe the Clomid, which we will try when I have a full cycle…so we wait. My OB was just so stinking sweet and understanding of our situation and promised me that he would never send me away. He does not accept Medicaid, nor will I put myself or my children on that government funded program, and the OB understood that and actually encouraged me not to put us on it. Given the current political climate with Obama care, I cannot be guaranteed that I won’t be forced to remain on it. I was on Medicaid when I was pregnant with Sofia and the care was horrible. It reminded me of hearing my mother’s woes about Tricare (dependant military coverage), which also stunk. Sofia was on Medicaid up until she had surgery on her nose after she was a year old. We then became aware of exactly how Medicaid works and how doctors DO NOT get paid what they should get paid, which in turn raises the doctor’s costs and the cost of private insurance. We will stick with paying out of pocket until Malachi get s a job that either offers benefits or pays him enough where we can purchase our own private coverage.

We took the girls in for their check up with the pediatrician, and Charlotte has finally made it into the 5^th percentile for her weight! She will have all the blood work she had done last year, redone this month, but because she is finally on the growth chart it indicates that all is well; not that we ever were worried since all the blood work was excellent last year! Charlotte only got two vaccines (ethical) and Sofia needed none. Both girls were well behaved and received a book from the doctor as a prize! My girls LOVE books like their parents. Sofia did end up getting sick the day after the doctor’s visit and came down with a fever of 103 F°, and with her red dye allergy I was frantic to find some dye free CHILDREN’S Tylenol to no avail. No one carries it nor can the pharmacies order it because it is not in their order form book. So I had to order it online. I just gave her Motrin and brought her back to the doctor for a strep test, which came back negative. So it was just a virus that ran its course and she is all better now, thanks be to God! The girls’ pediatrician also does not accept Medicaid but assured us that she would still see the girls and we could pay out of pocket if need be. The Lord is faithful!

We are not destitute, and the Lord continues to provide for us. We are going to be using the Angel Food Ministries food program for a while, and I have cut our budget down to the bare bones (the essentials). We will be cutting our house phone off this week (keeping our cell phones) and we have cut the cable off (which was a luxury for a time) and have put a hold on the different ministries we were faithfully giving to monthly (we expect to restart that once Malachi gets a job). I receive the G.I. Bill each month while I am in school working on my Bachelors (online of course), which pays for our rent, praise be to God! We won’t feel the pinch of Malachi’s lay off for about 4 weeks or so. He is getting paid for the entire month of April, and we have a bit of a buffer in our bank that will allow us to be comfortable for about a month or so.

At the zoo with the girls for the members only first viewing of the new Big Cats exhibit

The Lord has blessed me with a best friend that has been such an encouragement to me, and many new and old friends who have come along side to support and pray for us during this time; but we are not sad or down. We are rejoicing in the Lord always, and He can do with our lives as He wills, for He is ALL Sovereign and our lives are about glorifying Him. We are not moping around like wounded puppies, and we fully trust in the Lord’s decisions with our lives. We are looking at this as an even greater opportunity to bring glory to the Lord and testify of His faithfulness. We lack nothing and want for nothing.

We don’t want anyone’s pity. We want those who hear about our situation to come along side us and get excited about what the Lord is doing and is going to do with our lives. We realize we are not entitled to a thing in this life, not even salvation; so anything the Lord gives is a blessing that He gives as He pleases for His glory alone.

This has been another lesson for me to totally rely on God alone and no one else. While I love my husband dearly, he is not God, and any provision he acquires comes directly from God. So we both wait on the Lord, but rejoice in Him contently! He has been so good to us, and we have no right to complain or fret. We are leaning on God’s word and our faith forces us to trust Him for everything.

I pray that all my readers are doing well and remembering that this life is not about you, it is about God. We were created by Him for His glory, so go glorify Him!

Books I am currently reading:

“The Cost of Discipleship” by Dietrich Bonhoeffer

“Chosen By God” by R.C. Sproul

“Bondage to the Will” by Martin Luther

“The Freedom of the Will” by Jonathan Edwards

“The Essential Edwards Collection: Jonathan Edwards on True Christianity” by Owen Strachan and Dough Sweeny, Foreward by John Piper

The Reformation Study Bible (ESV) from Ligonier Ministries (iPhone app)

Serving God and My Family,

Crystal <>< (SAHM)