God's Sovereignty - Family Update

Picture Credit

Picture Credit

"For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26"Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? 27"And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? 28"And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, 29yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. 30"But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith! 31"Do not worry then, saying, 'What will we eat?' or 'What will we drink?' or 'What will we wear for clothing?' 32"For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. 33"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 34"So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." ²⁵"For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?

²⁶"Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they?

²⁷"And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life?

²⁸"And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin,

²⁹yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these.

³⁰"But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith!

³¹"Do not worry then, saying, 'What will we eat?' or 'What will we drink?' or 'What will we wear for clothing?'

³²"For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.

³³"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

³⁴"So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Matthew 6: 25-34

I was reminded of these verses yesterday, shortly after receiving news from my husband that he had been laid off from his job with GeoEngineers, where he has worked these past two years.

I was on the phone with my best friend when my husband IM’d me that he was coming home early. I jokingly typed in the words “did you get fired?...lol”, but the response I received was no joke, “yep, laid off to be exact”. As I frantically begged for an explanation, all while still on the phone with my best friend, my husband made it very clear that he had definitely been laid off. I only truly lose my composure with two people; my husband and my best friend; and I happen to be on the phone with her while these truths became known to me. She dutifully listened and compassionately and encouragingly reminded me of God’s Sovereignty. She truly is the best kind of friend a person can have.

I have been battling anxiety the last 6 months, mostly caused by the miscarriages and unsettled hormones. The news of my husband’s lay off did not help my nerves at all, but only led me into a full on anxiety attack while on the phone with my best friend. Sofia noticed (it was obvious) that I was upset, and in her own almost 4 year old way, tried to comfort me. She has seen her momma cry several times in the last 6 months, and she has such a “helping” heart that she tries to make it better by reminding me that “Jesus will make it better mommy”; from the mouth of babes…(Matthew 21:16)

Later in the evening, when the dust had settled from my whirl wind anxiety, the Lord gently whispered to me “I clothe the lilies, how much more will I care for you my child?” I was stopped in my tracks and frantically searched for the scripture and there it was, resting most securely in Matthew chapter six. It has always been there, and I have read it a million times (a bit of an over exaggeration…but you get the point); but there it was, the Lord had spoken to me His very Word, and yes it did bring comfort. The Lord has never failed me. His word promises me He will never fail me. The Lord has always taken care of me and provided for my every need. The Lord’s word promises that He will take care of me. How quickly we forget these promises and comforts when our eyes/focus shifts momentarily from the eternal to the finite.

Last night, after the children were in bed, I began to stumble again in my thoughts and become discouraged. (See how fast that can happen?) I began to think that maybe the Lord took our last two babies because He knew Malachi would lose His job, and maybe we should be careful about getting pregnant again, since our medical insurance expires at the end of this month. (See how if we don’t take captive every thought unto the obedience of Christ, our thoughts can go down a path that betrays our every confession as a trusting disciple of Christ Jesus?) Yes, I went there, but only for a moment. God then reminded me of His Sovereignty in that He made sure that I was cared for and covered during my D&C. The Lord has a way of putting me back in my place and giving me righteous perspective of things.

In January’s edition of Tabletalk Magazine, the topic is “Anxiety and the Sovereignty of God”; which just so happen to arrive on my doorstep yesterday a few hours before receiving the news of Malachi’s lay off; how appropriate. The very first article is by R.C. Sproul, entitled “For My Good?”, where Sproul describes “an historic train wreck…[that] left my wife with an ongoing anxiety about being able to sleep on a train at night…[and that] left me with a back injury that took fifteen years of treatment and therapy to overcome” (Sproul, 2010, p.5-6). He goes on to say,

“Nevertheless, with these scars from the trauma we both learned a profound lesson about the providence of God. Clearly, God’s providence in this case for us was one of benign benevolence. It also illustrated to us an unforgettable sense of the tender mercies of God.” (p.6)

You can read the article in its entirety here at Ligonier Ministries.

What sticks in my mind from the article is the part where R.C. Sproul says, “The comfort that I enjoy from knowing God’s providence is mixed at times with the knowledge that His providence may bring me pain. I don’t look forward to the experience of pain with a giddy anticipation; rather, there are times when it’s necessary for me and for others to grit our teeth and to bear the burdens of the day” (p.7).

In another article in the same edition, entitled “Thinking Biblically About Worry”, by Paul David Tripp, he says “many of us live with a huge gap between the theological confidence that we celebrate on Sunday and the street-level fear, worry and anxiety that accompanies us the rest of the week” (p.12). Mr. Tripp reminds us of David, when he was fleeing his son who was seeking to kill him in order to take the throne, and how David during this time of great sorrow, says in Psalm 4:8 “In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety”. Mr. Tripp says, “David is experiencing the full weight of disappointment and danger of life in this fallen world, but he is not riddled with anxiety. His heart is at rest and his body is able to sleep, even in the middle of what would break the heart of any father” (p.13). He goes on to remind us that “The difficulties of life in this fallen world are the occasion of our worry, but not the cause” (p.13).

Mr. Tripp during the middle of his article makes a profound statement, that hit me right in the gut; “Behind every moment of worry is a war for the heart. This battle is about whether our hearts will be ruled…by the kingdom of God or the kingdom of self” (p.14). We were created to live for something far greater than ourselves. Mr. Tripp reminds me of this when he says “I was created to live for God – His Kingdom and His glory. I was designed to get my identity, meaning, and purpose, and my inner sense of well-being vertically. I was made to get my reason for doing what I am doing and my rest in the middle of doing it from God. But sin causes every one of us to live for ourselves, that is, to shrink our lives to the size of our lives. Sin causes us to reduce the field of our dreams and concerns down to our wants, our needs, and our feelings. Sin makes us scarily self-focused, self-absorbed, and self-motivated” (p.14).

This is where Matthew 6: 25-34 comes into focus. “Defeating worry is about giving the love and concern of your heart to the King and His kingdom and fighting the instinct to construct a Lilliputian kingdom of your own” (p.17).

My husband was laid off from his job with GeoEngineers yesterday, and while the next few weeks are uncertain, my confidence of the coming weeks is in the Lord. I know that my every need will be taken care of by the Lord Himself. This is yet another trial the Lord has brought our way to reveal Himself most powerful and Sovereign in and over our lives. I pray that as we walk (or crawl) through this trial, that everything we do and say glorifies the Lord. The next few weeks and months will be a time of prayer and seeking the Lord as to what He would have us do next. We have wanted to move for some time out of Louisiana, and the Lord has closed several doors to us in the last year, and this one may be the last one that needed to be closed to prepare us for a move. Either way, we will walk by faith and not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7), and trust the Lord do His will in our lives.

Serving God and My Family,

Crystal <>< (SAHM)